{"id":455,"date":"2026-11-11T17:43:09","date_gmt":"2026-11-11T23:43:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/?p=455"},"modified":"2026-11-11T17:43:09","modified_gmt":"2026-11-11T23:43:09","slug":"man-says-scarf","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/?p=455","title":{"rendered":"Man Says Scarf"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"Skill<\/td><\/a><\/td>\"Download<\/a><\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
Some of the most difficult people to crochet for are the men in our lives. Following these ultra simple instructions, you should be able to make a scarf that will get you grunts of approval from your favorite man.

The men in our lives \u2013 the brothers, uncles, pops, husbands, sons, and best buds are some of the most difficult people on earth to thrill with a crochet project. Worse than a teenage girl. Worse than that aunt you have whose OCD is out of control. It isn\u2019t because they\u2019re picky. Far from it. Its because they\u2019re so infuriatingly un-picky.

When we press them for details, we may get an exasperated \u201cI don\u2019t care! I\u2019ll love whatever you make me.\u201d At most, we\u2019ll get a color request, usually blue. While we appreciate the unconditional love, CAN WE GET A LITTLE GUIDANCE HERE??

Luckily for this project, my friend Paul gave me some specifics. \u201cBlue,\u201d he said. Like we didn\u2019t see that one coming. \u201cJust a simple scarf, with nothing frilly.\u201d

Man says \u201cblue.\u201d
Man says \u201csimple.\u201d
Man says \u201cscarf.\u201d
You got it. Let\u2019s crack open a brewski and get started.

***Special thanks to my son for modeling this scarf despite the fact that it was 90 degrees in the shade***<\/td><\/tr>
Sizes and Materials List …<\/strong><\/td><\/tr>
Size:<\/strong><\/td><\/td><\/tr>
Hook(s):<\/strong><\/td>US H\/8 (5.00 mm)<\/td><\/tr>
Yarn:<\/strong><\/td>I used Jo Sharp Silk Road DK Tweed (85% Wool, 10% Silk, 5% Cashmere) (2 balls) because it was in my stash. Do me a favor and keep the fiber content to yourself and tell him it was a new kind of steel wool or something.<\/td><\/tr>
Recommended Yarn:<\/strong><\/td>I tested this pattern again with Caron Simply Soft and I liked the results much better.<\/td><\/tr>
Notions:<\/strong><\/td>1 yarn needle. Any other notions you wish to have about the world and its inhabitants are optional.<\/td><\/tr>
Gauge:<\/strong><\/td>Paying careful attention to these directions should yield you a manly scarf in no time.<\/td><\/tr>
Notes …<\/strong><\/td><\/tr>
Stitches Used<\/strong><\/td><\/td><\/tr>
Abbreviations<\/strong><\/td><\/td><\/tr>
Special Stitches<\/strong><\/td><\/td><\/tr>
Abbreviations<\/strong><\/td><\/td><\/tr>
Instructions …<\/strong><\/td><\/tr>
Base Chain<\/td>Chain 20.<\/td><\/tr>
Row 1<\/td>Hdc in the second chain from the hook and in each chain to the end. Turn (18 stitches).<\/td><\/tr>
Row 2<\/td>Ch 2, turn, hdc in each stitch to the end.<\/td><\/tr>
Rows 3- whatever<\/td>Repeat Row 2 until you\u2019re satisfied with the length.<\/td><\/tr>
Final row<\/td>Ch 1, sc crochet across<\/td><\/tr>
Finishing …<\/td><\/tr>
Fasten off and weave in your ends.

Congratulations!<\/td><\/tr>
Extra instructions below are optional and are meant solely to keep you focused on the task at hand.<\/td><\/tr>
Row 35<\/td>This is a simple pattern. You\u2019re probably bored enough to want to watch the latest MTV reality show offering. I suggest you switch over to a home improvement program instead. Try to stay awake while the grout dries.<\/td><\/tr>
Row 52<\/td>Practice saying words like \u201cconduit\u201d and \u201cflange.\u201d<\/td><\/tr>
Row 67<\/td>By this time, you\u2019re starting to wonder when it will end. Don\u2019t worry, you\u2019ll finish this WAY before that dishwasher gets fixed or the garage gets cleaned out.<\/td><\/tr>
Row 86<\/td>Almost done. Take a break to take a swig out of the soda bottle. If you empty it, be sure to put it back in the fridge.<\/td><\/tr>
Row 90<\/td>You should be feeling the macho by now. Resist the urge to try peeing standing up.<\/td><\/tr>
Pattern and photos \u00a9 Alia Smith
(Originally published in Winter 2008 edition of Crochet Uncut)<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

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Some of the most difficult people to crochet for are the men in our lives. Following these ultra simple instructions, you should be able to make a scarf that will get you grunts of approval from your favorite man.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":458,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,61,21],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-455","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-clothing","category-learners-permit","category-wraps"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/455","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=455"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/455\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":459,"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/455\/revisions\/459"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/458"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=455"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=455"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/crochetuncut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=455"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}